Don’t be a Slave to the Man

So just to get some of the boring admin crap out the way first… Like, where the hell have I been all your life? And why the heck haven’t I blogged in forever? I shall explain.

I may have accidentally had an unscheduled extended break from the blogosphere for a while. Like somewhere around a year ish. The reason why? Well I started a new job. A job that came with a whole new lifestyle and a lack of routine. A job in which time just ‘flies’ by and I feel tired approximately 90% of the time.

I am a flight attendant now. I love my job. It’s fun, I get to work with some great people and fly all over the country, seeing cities I wouldn’t see otherwise. But boy, has it been a lifestyle change!

It’s no 9-5. Sometimes I start work at 4am, sometimes it’s 10pm. Sometimes I’m away from home for four days at a time, sometimes it’s only one.I usually only sleep in my own bed a few nights a week and miss my partner and doggo A LOT! There’s no routine. And I like routine. Even excercise has taken a bench seat. When I am home, I really value the time I get to spend with my two boys. I appreciate the sleep ins, being an introvert as much as socially acceptable and catching up on z’s. But I also have to find time for life errands, seeing friends and just general adulting.

The adjustment was especially hard when I first started. I was exhausted allllll the time (now I’m just tired the majority of the time), I was getting sick way too regularly (because, passengers and germs and run down), and did I mention I was always bloody tired? So naturally, my absence from One Active Life was to be expected in those initial months of finding my feet and getting accustom (both mentally and physically) to #cabincrewlife. But slowly, as I spent more time away from writing, the less motivated I was. I thought about it sometimes, but never opened my laptop. The more time away, the less passionate I became. To the point, One Active Life wasn’t even something I thought about anymore.

Writing used to be something I enjoyed. Something I loved. Something that gave me a sense of purpose and gave me a outlet for self expression. It wasn’t a burden. It was a joy. A way for me to clear my head and hopefully inspire others at the same time. So I’ve had to ask myself, how did I let it get to this point? How did I allow my priorities to slip?

I read a quote the other day which is relevant on so many levels, including this context. It said:

Your killing yourself for a job that would replace you within a week if you dropped dead. Take care of yourself.

Heavy. But holy wow isn’t it true?!

So many of us work so hard, we have no life left in us to actually live. To actually enjoy our down time, our hobbies, our passions, our families, our friends – the simple things. How freakn sad is that! Where’s the balance? And for the most part we are burning ourselves out for someone who doesn’t even appreciate or acknowledge all the hard work and overtime we put in.

To a large company you are disposable. You are just a number. A easily replaceable cog in the machine. If that’s all you are to them, don’t make them your whole life. Unless you are self-employed, living out your passion or perhaps working for a small business that truly appreciates you, I know you can relate! (Having worked for both a small business and large organisations, I’m raising my hands in an ‘amen’ to that!)

By all means, do your job, do it well, work hard but don’t take that shit home with you. Clock off and clock off mentally too. Don’t get too busy having a career that you forget to have a life. Stop working so bloody hard for a company that doesn’t value your worth and start living! Find a healthy work life balance so that in twenty years when you do look back, you remember doing more than just working, eating and sleeping.

And while I (clearly) have a lot to express about all this to the point I could go on to write a novel, I’ll try not to digress any further. Basically, I’ve realised that I too have allowed my job to take over my life this past year. And as much as I do love flying, (it’s not the job itself I have beef with, but the by-product of #cabincrewlife aka the tiredness, the fatigue, exhaustion and lack of motivation to do anything other than hermit), I’ve decided things need to change. I’m no longer going to be a slave to the Man. I’m going to do as much as I can to be home more often and manage my sleep. To enjoy my time off and spend time with loved ones. But most importantly, I am going to start writing again, rekindle that passion and maybe even feel purpose beyond serving tea and coffee on a plane.

I can’t promise it’ll be a regular thing but I am committed to do something for ME again. I AM going to fall in love with writing again.

Unit next time…

Love Eloise x

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Shocking Stuff: I am a Woman and I Don’t Want Kids!

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I decided a long time ago that I don’t want to have kids. I have zero maternal instinct, I’m awkward around children and I basically see my future with a house full of puppies, not babies.

For some people, this seems to be a very difficult concept to understand. ‘WHAT?!’ ‘Why not?’ ‘Never?!’ ‘Like, not even in the future?’

Yes, you heard me right. ‘I am never having kids.’

I don’t know what it is about this statement that shocks people so much. I don’t see why a woman choosing not to have children is such a bombshell. Even my friends who have heard me say it many times still seem flabbergasted by such a profound declaration. Look, just because I was born with a uterus and ovaries doesn’t mean my purpose in life is to bare children.

Pregnancy is a beautiful thing. What the human body can do, how a woman’s body can grow another human being and bring a new life into the world is beyond amazing. And while I do have the anatomy to produce a little miracle or two of my own, I’m just not up for it. Firstly, I am not really willing to put my body though all that change and trauma and I definitely do not have the pain threshold to go through childbirth. But secondly, and most importantly, I just don’t see motherhood as part of my destiny.

I have other plans for my life. I want to travel the world. I want to focus on building a fulfilling career that brings me happiness and enables me to inspire others. I want to devote all my heart to loving my partner (and puppies.) I could list all the reasons why I do not want to have kids, but it doesn’t matter. Nor should it matter to anyone else. It is my body, my life and my choice.

Just as it is one woman’s choice to have a family, a whole lot of other women choose to live their life without them. And each and every one of us has the right to make this decision without being scrutinised. The same as you wouldn’t criticise a mother for the way they raise their children, you shouldn’t question a woman’s choice not to be a mother. It is equally offensive and disrespectful. And frankly, none of your business.

I didn’t always want to live a childless existence. Growing up, I thought I would have kids one day. You know, grow up, fall in love, get married and have babies. That’s what is meant to happen, right? Isn’t that is the formula to a happy life?

Not being one to conform to societies expectations, I made the decision for myself that I do not want to have kids. I am 26 now, I have grown, I have matured, I have a greater understanding of my self, my goals, my aspirations and what makes me happy. I had always left the question of having children semi open. I thought, one day I will find the person I am going to spend the rest of my life with and maybe he will want children. That was the only thing that could have swayed me. Now that I have found my person, and luckily he doesn’t want kids either, things seem to be going according to plan.

To be fair, the relationship, married, babies path is one many people will or have followed. Good on them. I have friends and family who have had children and are the happiest I have ever seen them. I see the beauty and the love in their little family units and it fills my heart with joy! But it still doesn’t change the fact that motherhood isn’t for me. I am perfectly happy to simply mother a golden retriever or three.

Love Elo xxx

Guest Post: The Secret to Reaching Your Fitness Goals

The secret to keeping that New Years resolution to living an active life 

It’s that time of the year again…a fresh start, a new beginning. It’s a time when we make promises to ourselves to do more, be more and achieve some of the things that we either dream of or lie in the back of our minds.

It may be a cliché but many of us still have one key aim at the beginning of the year – ‘to be the healthiest and fittest me I can possibly be’.

“I plan to eat better, be more active, exercise more… I want to be happier and healthier.” Sound familiar? While there is no better time than right now, if the New Year has given you the motivation and drive to set some big resolutions around your health, you are probably looking for the key to keep you motivated.

Stop! Before you go off making big goals to work out every day for the next 12 months, let’s take it easy…make small steps to achieve big things. You don’t want to feel completely defeated by the end of the second or third week, sprawled out on the couch demanding someone get you a chocolate bar ASAP to fuel your energy.

Yes, I hear you, not everyone loves slumming it out on a treadmill or spending hours at the gym lifting weights. Yes, running can be a nightmare sometimes and I know you might not be a sports person. So how can you possibly become fit?

Well, there’s a secret and I am about to tell you after a short and meaningful anecdote (you’re going to love it).

So I’m an outdoorsy Australian who has recently travelled to and lived in Canada (yep, I went from crystal blue coastal living to waking up to -40 degree weather and elk creating unmovable live barriers on the snowy walk to work). Over there it’s a completely different ball game! I had to find new ways to stay active in a country that has a serious time limit for how long you can spend outside without freezing to death…you don’t want to get that wrong.

While I had the opportunity to do a bit of snowboarding (which is an intense workout by the way), I ended up joining a gym and trained daily to stay fit. I have had personal trainers before so I had an idea of what to do.

While this was a great way to keep the delicious Canadian treats at bay (well, kind of), after making the transition back from slippery, white slopes to the rather hot but beautiful Australian scenery, I was over it. I didn’t want to lift another dumbbell and I certainly didn’t want the word elliptical to be part of my morning routine.

You’ve been there too, am I right?

Well, I’m here to share what I believe is the secret to finding an exercise regime that will help you achieve your New Years resolution – to be healthier, fitter, stronger, more active…what ever it may be.

Here it is…

The secret…Are you sure your ready for this?

Try everything until you find that magic fit!

Get out there and give a lot of different sports, exercises and activities a go. Try new things like crossfit, unicycling, adult gymnastics, squash, martial arts, rock climbing or an alternate style of dance. Just give it a go. Con your friends to come along (they have to have something you can bribe them with – a trip to the frozen yoghurt shop after?) if your feeling a bit scared.

Don’t worry about how you look to others. Everyone has been there. The athletes and the experts have all been there. They’ve been in your shoes (hopefully not literally – that’s creepy).

Ever since I’ve come home I’ve put myself out there and tried a few things. As a result, I’ve found a few magic sports that are the perfect match for me. Hip hop, burlesque, I’ve dabbled in ballet, gymnastics and I’ve found a love for pole fitness.

If you find something that you enjoy doing, that you feel confident and proud to be a part of, the motivation for your New Years resolution is right there.

If you find something you love, keep at it!

You never know, keeping fit naturally might just come easy.

 

By Alyssa Gill

Alyssa is a persuasive freelance writer and strategic social media expert. She is the Founder and Chief Wordsmith of Squib Communications, a company that is helping lifestyle, creative and home businesses to create more meaningful partnerships with their customers.

She also has a passion for all things active – she’s a pole fitness teacher, hip hopper, burlesquer and basketball-enthuasiast.

Plus she recently started the Instagram page @myactivewear, a site that brings together and showcases real people being active and healthy in their favourite activewear. Follow @myactivewear.

Website: http://www.squib.com.au
Connect with Alyssa on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/squibcommunications/